The Hits Just Keep On Coming

It seems like an entire year has passed since I last updated this blog.  SO much has happened and unfortunately the main part of it has to be filed in the "unbloggable" category.  I used to HATE it when people did that shit when I read blogs so I sincerely apologize for that, but I will tell you as much as I can and if you want more details, feel free to email me and I will give you all the info.  But since most of the people who read my blog know me in real life, they probably already know what I am referring to.  For those who don't, someone close to me and my life made the ultimate in bad decisions and did something life altering and earth shattering that could have very easily resulted in death.  That is all the information I am going to give on this very public forum, but needless to say it shook me to the core.  And for someone who is supposed to be avoiding stress at all costs, this put more stress on me than I have lived through in a very long time.

So here I am failing at the whole avoiding stress thing.

Since I can't publicly bitch about the unbloggable I will publicly bitch about finances.  I have mentioned on here before about how I was counting on a pretty significant bonus from one of my clients to get me through my maternity leave.  After over a month from working from home to make sure I lived up to my end of the arrangement I was given the go ahead to cut the check today.  Sounds great, right?  Well the shitty part is that they told me to cut the check for HALF the amount the I was expecting.  Half.  Holy shit.  Unbe-freaking-lievable.  So let me recap.  I was expecting to get a $10,000 bonus check and also expecting approximately a $5,000 tax refund.  That would give me enough money to live for about 3 months (yes, I know...I live in the Bay Area of California which is arguably one of the most expensive places to live in the entire US).  Even getting all of that money I would have been pretty screwed considering I have already been off work for a month and a half and the baby isn't even here yet.  My plan originally was to use that money for the three months I was going to take off after the baby arrived.  So you can see how my plan has already been thwarted...

And now...my bonus that was supposed to be for $10,000 only came in at $5,000.  And I am indeed getting back approximately $5,000 as a tax refund, BUT it turns out I made too much money last year and therefore between what I owe at the end of the year combined with my estimates that are also due on the 15th, I owe the tax man $2,500.  (How can I get money back and also owe money you ask?  The Ex and I do our taxes together and make it so that she gets a fat refund that we then split.  Being self employed I pay estimates and usually end up breaking even or even getting some money back which usually goes toward the estimate that is due on April 15th so I usually don't owe anything out of pocket on the 15th and just get to pocket half of The Ex's refund).  Oh, and on top of that it apparently cost us $1,250 to get our taxes done this year, so that has to be paid as well.

So final tally:  Amount expected to receive:  $15,000.  Amount actually received?  $6,800.

The hits, they just keep on coming...

A final note for today...my update on my doctors appointment.  The Girl was all over the place during her NST so I was totally convinced that she had passed with flying colors.  She did indeed pass, but apparently it was still just "by the skin of her teeth."  Or maybe they just like to fuck with me and tell me that every time.  I don't know.  I told my favorite nurse about the stress that had come down over the weekend and she was absolutely floored at what I had been through and ran out the door to look at what my blood pressure had been.  I know this is going to be shocking but guess what?  It was up.  I know, I know, total shock.  So they took it again after I had been laying down for the NST and the top number was still crap, but the bottom number went back down to 78 so that was good.  (I think "normal" is 120 over 80 and mine was 145 over 78 at the end).  My doctor heard this and made mention of "squeaking out just a little more time" and thankfully they sent me home.  They took pity on my sad, tired, pitiful little ass and blissfully sent me home.

I am 35 weeks today and my next appointment is this Friday.  My best guess is that if my blood pressure either goes down (by some miracle) or stays the same I will be good to go through the weekend.  But if it is at all elevated I think I am being checked in and my guess is that this baby will make her arrival sometime over the weekend.  So all of you internets out there...please think low blood pressure thoughts for me on Friday.  I need it.  Oh, and send some cash.  :)