Tuesday, February 17, 2009

If This Were A Perfect World...

If this were a perfect world...I would be able to sit down to dinner with my child, we would both eat off of our plates until we were full, we might have some fun conversation and a few smiles, and then we would get down and clean up. But this isn't a perfect world. And I swear to fucking God that I sometimes think I might lose my mind if I have to spend meal time like this for the next how-ever-many years.

I can't even explain in words how utterly frustrating it is to eat with my son. He talks and talks and talks and he plays with his fork and his spoon, and he pretends that the spoon becomes a truck and drives around the outskirts of his place mat, and he basically does everything BUT actually put food into his mouth. I could make an entire blog post about all the things he does at meal time rather than eat.  I swear the kid could sit at the table for an hour and if never prompted, he would literally never put anything into his mouth.

"[Boy], take a bite..." I tell him.

"Dis one?" He grins and points to one of the options on his plate?

"Sure. That's fine.  Eat anything off any part of your plate."

"Dis one...?" He points to another option while smiling a devil-smile.

This can go on for a good 3 minutes or so. Eventually he will sense my frustration and pick one of the things on his plate and take JUST ONE bite of that item. Then he goes back to playing and the scene repeats a few minutes later. There are nights where I just decide I just can't possibly care anymore and in my head think, screw it, and stop asking. This is one of those nights. He has maybe taken 4 bites of food since he sat down over half an hour ago. I got up from the table and came write this blog post and all the while he is still sitting in the dining room chatting away with his fork and his spoon, NOT EATING.

And the kicker? If I were to go out there right now, which I will do in a matter of moments, and take his plate away he will.not.care. Just doesn't give a crap. He won't come up to me later and tell me he's hungry.  He won't eat more tomorrow.  He won't ask for a treat before bed.  He just won't. And this is why every single time I go to the gastro doctor for a weigh in, the kid hasn't gained any weight.  And this is why I get so stressed out about this particular issue when (didn't he get the memo?) I am supposed to be chilling the fuck out and not making my blood pressure rise!!!

I have blogged about this before, and I am sure I will blog about it again. I am a very lucky person in that my child is pretty easy going and behavior-wise is a really easy kid to raise. People tell me all the time how lucky I am that he's so "easy." I welcome them to attempt to get him to eat at meal times and see how they fare. Because for me? It is my DAILY battle. And some days it gets the best of me. Today is one of those days.  Sometimes this motherhood thing is just tough...


Anonymous said...

This is my son. And I know you aren't supposed to do this, but we bribe him and it works. Basically, he now knows that if he eats, he'll get dessert. If he doesn't, he will not. I think he enjoys the banter and the arguing. But on nights when I can get my partner to not argue with him, he actually just eats because he wants dessert. For dessert, we offer one scoop of vanilla ice cream or a few organic alphabet cookies, for which he has to play a guessing game about the letter before he gets each cookie. Yes, they both have sugar in them, but the ice cream might help with the weight a little.

AuntFancy said...

After having dinner with you and The Boy, I completely understand your frustration. I wish I could wave my magic Harry Potter wand and make him stuff his face and his belly for you!